Why "People People" don't become Doctors... :-O

Alright, let's face it. If you've been a patient in a Doctor's office or a Hospital you could probably attest to the fact that your doctor is not a "People Person." They could very well be a friendly and inviting person but definitely not a "People Person."

Let me clarify.

"People People"aka crazy people- You know, that extrovert, forget joining the party, be the party, spontaneous, taking life by the seat of their pants, lead role-center stage, let's go see the world with no plan, no watch, and those words "daytimer" "day-planner" and "Let me check my schedule"... Well those words are forbidden and usually replaced with "Why the heck not?!"

Just in case you're not smellin' what I'm steppin' in...

All those things right there. Yeah, that's me. I'm that "People Person" and I'm slowly figuring out why I'm seem to be the only one amongst my very dignified colleagues and classmates.

Ok. First of all, I'm being forced to give up my intense aversion to day planners. AHH!!

Second, more time spent with a text book and headphones and less spent with...well... people!

Third, no real people person even wants to think about school for 8 years plus a 4 year residency.

So, that about sums it up. In a profession where humor, happiness, communication, smiles and little craziness is needed; most extroverts wouldn't dare sacrifice the goods it takes to get there.

And there lies my motivation.

Sick people need happy people!
Hurting people need hope!
And the dying need to know the love of Jesus!

The Middle East need crazy people- crazy enough to go beyond borders with bandages and a bible. Latin America needs to know that the Saints they serve have no power but God does through Healing Hands. Africa needs medical help now and to know that real love does exist!

So I continue, staying true to my roots of being crazy. Yet, by the grace of God having to learn to be faithful to books and a day-planner. I'll learn to remedy the situation, if my soon to be all-consuming summer science classes don't allow me to get my travel on, spring break and Christmas time are going to be my time to shine. India, Pakistan, Turkey, Rwanda, Dominican, Chile. I'll still see you my friends. Just a different time of year. This summer may be my last normal summer on the mission field but I won't let that stop me. Too much time spent without sending me overseas I start to get a little itchy. And for the sake of my sanity and endurance level in what my best friend likes to call "Doctor School" I cannot afford to get itchy. I will see this through.

Rescue Mission!

One of my most favorite mission's quotes of all time is this: "Some wish to live within the sound of a chapel bell; I wish to run a rescue mission within a yard of hell." These words were spoken by C.T. Studd. It might sound odd to you to wish such things or just weird that such an abrupt and somewhat graphic quote would be my favorite. I love it because it gives a picture to my greatest heart desire, to rescue those who so desperately need it and to enter into countries most wouldn't dare dream of.

This photo speaks volumes. I could stare at it for hours. In my mind it illustrates the lines of people waiting for hope and the people I plan to share hope with.




Though I was originally planning on starting missions full time this year it was in these pictures that God began to speak to my heart that I was to be a Doctor so that I could teach them who God, the real doctor, truly is.





The next few pictures were taken by Mandy Deitering. The first one I love so much. It is a picture of the moment Pastor Pat asked all the people at the Sabana Jegua Crusade to place their hand where their pain is and pray with him to receive healing.



This little girl was standing in line for prayer. She had two large abscesses about the size of my palm under where my hand is placed on her arm.



Healing and Miracles are as real today as Salvation. Just as Jesus used healing as evidence of the power of God in the Bible I know that he uses it today just the same. I've seen it with my own eyes and out of my own hands. Just like Salvation, healing is for everyone!

A Year End Review...

WHEW! I'm so glad this year is only a few weeks from being over. I'm no pessimist but this year has been extremely challenging to say the least. I could bore you with all the gory details of how ridiculous this year was but frankly I don't want to catch myself focusing on the bad things. I am just glad that I can see light at the end of the tunnel.

...I know that it would be better not to encourage yourself with seeing the light at the end of the tunnel but to find the light within the tunnel. I know we would be better off if we could focus on the good within the bad because there can always be good in everything. Throughout the year I did do that and it most certainly helped. However, now that the year is almost over, I've got a new job, I start school soon, I moving back home in a couple months all I can say is...

THANK THE LORD THIS YEAR IS ALMOST OVER AND NEXT YEAR IS GOING TO BE DIFFERENT AND BETTER! HAHA...

Sometimes I catch myself questioning "What went wrong?" "What mistakes did I make?" "Was it my fault all those things happened?" But I try not to be that psycho-analytical person. Who really knows if it's our own faults that bad things happened or if it's this fallen world we live in. It could be a little bit of both, I guess. I don't really care, honestly. I'm not perfect. I've made mistakes and I can promise you and myself they won't be the last mistakes I ever make.

So here is the positive... The last year I've met and gained several wonderful friends that I will be friends with forever I'm sure. I've learned a gazillion (Yes, I said gazillion) things about life, relationships, God, the time for independence and the time for dependence, and many practical things. I've certainly experienced alot in 2011. So I'm sure there is growth there that I haven't yet realized. I'm thankful that this very ridiculous year somehow gave me vision for what God has for my life. And musically I've learned a lot and I'm thankful that I have significantly grown as a musician.

I'm thankful that I have figured out I'll never work for another Nursing Agency for as long as I live. I ultimately did what I felt like God told me I should. Was I right or not? Who knows, but I can't argue with the fact I believed with all my heart I was doing what I thought was right.

So anyways, there it is. My year end review. It all makes me feel like I'm finishing up a marathon in the cold. Ya know, the "super glad you made it through marathon but the one that makes you think I'll never run another marathon in the cold ever again."

Yeah, Good times!. :-)

Settling In? Say What??

Not too long ago the words "settling down" or "settling in" used to give me butterflies in my stomach. No part of me wanted to settle down anywhere. I was ready to SEE THE WORLD, embrace new things, meet new people and impact new cultures. Even though I have basically been doing those things since I graduated from High School still no part of me wanted to stop.

Let me first just explain to you this, I TOOK SO MUCH PRIDE in the fact that I owned so little. Anytime I wanted to move I could do so easily by packing my little car full and hitting the road. I loved it! So far I lived in all furnished places so I never had any need of buying any furniture. Well, the last apartment I lived in the whole thing was furnished except the fact I needed to buy a bed. Can I just tell you, as I was driving away from the mattress store with the new mattress in the back of my friend's truck. I suddenly realize..."Oh my sweet Lord... I now own a mattress. I can no longer just pack everything I own in my car. I'm stuck!" You might think I am crazy but I am being totally for real right now. Well I later verbalized my thought and my friend pretty much told me I was retarded and that it was just a cheap mattress if I wanted to leave without it was no big deal. That helped and so I continued with my feeling of freedom and with no obligation.

Slowly over the last year I could literally feel God start changing my heart and giving me a desire to "Settle down." Even then at times "AHHHH!" would pass through my thoughts. For whatever reason settling down was a scary idea to me. However, I can officially say with complete honesty I want to "Settle in!" It's crazy I know.

In march I will be looking for a house to rent in Arkansas. I even went and looked at furniture today and had no feelings of freaking out but just of excitement. Also, in January I start the Pre-Med program. YES that means I'm gonna be a doctor!! :-D The only thing that's between me and being a doctor is just a tad bit of school ha. Ok maybe a little more than a tad... 7 years of school to be exact. 3 years for Pre-Med and 4 years for Medical School. This might sound insane since I haven't spent more than 2 years in any place within my adult life let alone spend 7 just in school. I'm so ready for it though! It's so weird but I am so happy and excited that I will be right here for a LONG time. I will be specializing in Emergency Medicine so that I'm able to do medical clinics/disaster relief stateside and overseas. And yes, though I probably will keep my HOME here in Arkansas, after school is over I'll definitely be getting my travel on. I always believed there was a reason I like going new places... perhaps because that's what I'm made for. However, I've learned that to successfully travel and make an impact in the world a strong foundation and a solid home base is crucial. ;-)

Well I could go on about how excited I am about my new days coming up but I don't want to bore you. Have a nice night!

Ya gotta give love, to get love. :-)

Give Love, Get Love. What a concept right? Did you know it's scriptural... (we'll get to that later.)

This concept is one many of us don't operate in at times. We can get angry and resentful at the people we are close to because they did something or didn't do something.

... Whether it be from a spouse who is not loving you the way you'd like, or a girlfriend/boyfriend that's not treating you with the respect you desire or it could be the friend who seems to have fell off the face of the earth.

It happens to all of us, our feelings are hurt and then we either choose to get angry or we pretend to ignore it and let it percolate in our heads.

(Side note: **Men like to say they don't have these problems. They do, they just hide it better. Spend one night taking care of sick patients, men specifically, in the hospital and you'd see what I'm talking about. They always let out all their feelings to anyone willing to listen and I'm telling you men have ALOT of feelings. So just remember Women, if you ever hear a man say they don't have needs or don't have feelings just pretend to agree with them and deep down know that they're full of crap.)

The solution to it all is LOVE.

Don't you roll your eyes at me or think that its just a cliche. It might be a stereotyped expression but it's complete truth. You can tell me any situation, any problem, any hurt, any tear and I can show you how it all can be solved by LOVE.

Let me list a couple scriptures for you:

1 John 4:19- "We love Him, because he first loved us." (There is the Give Love, Get Love concept I was talking about. God knew He had to love us first to receive our love.)

1 John 4:19 (MSG version)- "We, though, are going to love—love and be loved. First we were loved, now we love. He loved us first."

1 Corinthians 13:7, 8- " Love never gives up, Love believes all things, Love hopes all things, Love endures all things. Love never fails."

We ALL underestimate the power of love.

Let's talk about Marriages for a second. Unfortunately even in the church there is a high divorce rate. WHY??? Love. My friends, you cannot run out of love. No, love does not run out remember..."love never gives up, love endures all things." Divorce happens because people stop acting like love. That is why marriages end, why relationships stop, why friendships break, and why bridges are burned.

When you stop acting out in love you will lose every relationship you have!

Ask me how to make a marriage work... LOVE always, never stop acting like love, and when you are angry LOVE anyways.

You might ask..."What do you mean when I'm angry love anyways? I always love my spouse just because I'm angry doesn't mean I stopped loving them." Very true. Love is not a feeling though, at times it can 'feel' like a feeling but it is not. Love is a decision and love is an action. When we get angry we don't stop loving, most of the time we just stop acting like love. This is not just for marriages but for friendships, work relationships and every relationship you have.

...It could be the nasty chick that sits in the neighboring cubicle, or in my case, that annoying nurse that won't stop acting like she is the queen of the universe, it could be the cashier at your usual coffee shop that seems like the most rude person on earth. What happens then? We love. We love even though we feel like kicking them in the shins. We bring them coffee one day. We do them a favor, call them just to show you care, serve them in some way, do something they are supposed to do and not take the credit. When it's a sibling or a family member, make them dinner, take them out, do their laundry, buy them something. Just love.

Everyone would (in time) respond to us if we chose to love like that.

People who struggle with Psychosis disorder are the very most difficult people to relate to ever... simply because...well, they be crazy. However, even those people respond to acts of love. I have had the privilege of caring for Psych patients for quite sometime. I can't tell you how many patients that I've had that respond to me positively and only me. Why? Because even though they might be terribly annoying sometimes I chose to be caring, be patient and love them none the less.

Just know, I have yet to perfect this area myself. We all have room to grow in it, after all it is a "growth" process. What matters is that we all take action towards loving people more. When we do that we learn not only to love ourselves more (and we all need that!) but also we learn to love God more. I can't explain to you the science of how that happens I just know it does happen. Try it out and see!!

In closing, here is my version of the "Love Chapter" aka 1 Corinthians 13-

"God put his love into action by creating me. I have the ability to live free of fear, of sickness, and sin because of love. I can have all the faith in the world but without love I have nothing and I am nothing. When I love fully it means I do not give up. It means I put others before myself always. When I love fully it means I don't envy what I don't have. It means I don't pridefully walk around and boast of what I am or what I have. It means I am caring and kind always. When I love fully it means I do not keep record of anyones failures, it means I don't even revel in my own failures. When I love fully I am always in faith, I am always hopeful, I am always positive, and I have what it takes to endure through every circumstance. When I love fully the love in me never fails!"


Man, that makes me feel like my toes have just been stepped on. Ha. Like I said, it's a growth process.

Learning from the Old.

I'm so excited about my new blog, new journeys, and fresh starts. Praise the Lord that everyday can be a new day if we so choose.

For the last, nearly 7 years I have moved and traveled many places. I have seen so many things, countries, churches, and people. Each change in my surrounding I experienced challenges, blessings, and trials. It taught me to honor and respect differences in people. I struggle to put into words how much each change has taught me about the Grace, Love, and the Compassion of our God. I have lived in three states and spent extended periods of time in different countries. Needless to say, I have come across and learned to know many different types of people. I saw the Love of God poured to each one and each culture. Sometimes we can get comfortable in our lives and the way we see things, we forget what it is like for others. We forget the magnitude of the greatness of our God. How intense his love and grace is for each of us.

I say all this to explain I used to be reluctant to admit the many places I have lived and the many things I have experienced. I am nearly 25 yet I have moved more places in the last 7 years than many adults have lived in their entire lives. I have a heart for the nations and an adventurous, spontaneous need to GO. Go anywhere, everywhere... the more dangerous, the more exciting, the better. I used to think there is something wrong with me. Fear of commitment maybe, the lack of desire to be planted, fear of obligation perhaps...

Just recently God began to taint that view. He began to play back my experiences and show me what I've learned, how I've changed, how I've grown... grown into the person of God I was intended to be. He showed me there is a difference between my fear and my readiness. I have gone at God's moment's notice. I have traveled different continents at his calling. At each place I received an equipping that will be called upon in the future. God spoke to my heart one day and he said "My dear, do not be ashamed of your past but proclaim it for those moments have made you stronger and I need that strength."

And so I continue... I continue to go at his calling and to learn from the past.